jus realised that iv not been sharing my medical school life for quite some time d...
2day at least i have some materials to write here.

iv never tot of being a surgeon, and 2day's incidence had consolidated my belief even more.
few hours had relapsed since the autopsies i "performed" (more accurately, jus assisted by observing more closely) tis morning, but the bodies' smell still lingering in my mind.

we've done 2 post-mortems 2day, the first one was a Philipine lady who was postulated to be sexually assaulted and killed. i would like to express my deepest sorrow to her encounterment and da biggest rage and resentment to whoever done tis to her.

the 2nd case was an 8-month old infant whose cause of death remained pending for lab results. it's kinda rare to see a paediatric case so the doctors wanted us to involve and learn more. i was startled when the dr asked us to make a vertical cut from the infant's chest down till her pelvis. holding the knife, i could feel my heart racing and without me realising it, my hand was trembling as well. i placed the sharp knife on the baby's chest, but couldn make any cut downwards. i was too weak (perhaps not physically) inside that i felt sorry for her if i were to do so (it's a delusional thought, but i jus couldn do it, i felt her pain). at last i gave up... n no one else dared to try as well.

i tot the dr had given up upon me after my silly act, but instead he asked me to separate the baby's scalp from her skull. thank God i managed to do it although i could see some blood oozing out. the baby's brain was extracted by putting her head into a water basin (differs from the adult method).

the autopsy went on smoothly. then i came to almost the end at the suturing part. we were asked to rotate among ourselves to do the suturing. it was the first time that i sutured on a 'real' flesh. omg my frens told me that my hands were trembling, again!!! wat an embarrassment! i volunteered to do most part of the suturing to reduce the tremor. finally iv gained control over the suturing hand but realised that the other hand holding the forceps were still vibrating. imagine what will happen in future if i am to suture ppl's perineum in O&G. oh no!!!

in conclusion, it was a new and fresh experience. but i still could not cultivate any interest in forensic medicine. now that iv completed signing my card, it's a relief that i dun have to step into the post-mortem room in short-term.
p/s: the smell can really grab away ur appetite whole day long, and even weeks or months.

may the deceased rest in peace.
Amitabha.