RANDOM's random thoughts

An idle mind is indeed the devil’s workshop, as the saying goes.

Too many thoughts have been lingering in my idle mind since… (perhaps yesterday?)

In fact im not thinking of anything ‘devil’, but somehow the mind has been stuffed with those trivial thoughts that would not make any difference even if I had swept them under the carpet.

have been thinking of...
~the holidays after my finals, of which im anticipating but not sure whether I can really enjoy.
~the Kumar & Clark Clinical Medicine which is definitely thinner than Stephanie Meyer’s Twilight or New Moon but I’v never be able to read until the last page.
~the ECG Made Easy which is not so easy after all when u’v just finished the first chapter.
~the Medicine n Society notes which are always so hypnotizing and boring just as the posting itself.
~the little keyboard at home that iv left since childhood, of which iv not been touching for years but hoping to learn playing it tis time, seriously.
~my family members who are 360km away from me, whom I’v just met 2 weeks ago but it feels like years since I last talked to them.
~the people that I’v left behind my mind and who have probably deleted me out of their minds too.
~the permata swimming centre where I used to swim and play badminton every wk.
~my yoga mat that has been declared invisible 3 years ago.
~the days when I worked as a barista in Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf along with the soothing jazz music . sometimes even trying to recall the SOP of making an espresso, a macchiato, or perhaps Americano, an ice-blended Belgium Choc, foam-filled cappuccino, brewing regular roast or stewing a jar of fruit tea…
~and many more of which I could not write down in words since there are too many of them.
~and etc...

those subtle thoughts are driving me insomnic at times...

now, I just want to:
~crumble up those thoughts,
~or tear them into pieces,
~or burn them into ashes,
~or throw them into whatever incinerator
~or let them carried away by Radicare or whatsoever...

Let’s unleash those thoughts when their time comes, obviously not now when im goin to dive in my dream river.

Let me have a tight sleep tonight, and the nights that follow...

见苦知福

今天到一家爱滋病院探访患者，深深领悟此静思语。

常常抱怨生活里种种的不足，

但是，

当生命的长度变成倒数的号码时，这些芝麻小事何足挂齿？

突然想起《一公升眼泪》里的一句话：

“跌倒了，自己爬起来，蓝蓝的天空依然对着你微笑”。

(taken in tanjung karang, 8am)

原来我是幸运的。

原来我是幸福的。

~阿弥陀佛~

特别分享之《然后怎样》

完成了所谓的理想
放纵了情绪的泛滥
汗都流干 天都微亮 然后怎样
拥有了旅行的空档
却遗失流浪的背囊
沿着轨道 一直流浪 然后怎样
假期过完 有什么打算
走过一个天堂 少一个方向
谁在摧我成长 让我失去迷途的胆量

我怕谁失望 我为谁而忙
我最初只贪玩 为何变负担
为何我的问题 总得等待别人的答案
我的快乐时代唱烂
才领悟代价多高昂
不能满足 不敢停站 然后怎样

完成了所谓的理想
放纵了情绪的泛滥
汗都流干 天都微亮 然后怎样
拥有了旅行的空档
却遗失流浪的背囊
沿着轨道 一直流浪 然后怎样
假期过完 有什么打算
走过一个天堂 少一个方向
谁在摧我成长 让我失去迷途的胆量

我怕谁失望 我为谁而忙
我最初只贪玩 为何变负担
为何我的问题 总得等待别人的答案
我的快乐时代唱烂
才领悟代价多高昂
不能满足 不敢停站 然后怎样

-----------------------------------------------

总是为自己设下许多目标，大的小的都有。

完成了一个，就很自然的拟定下一个。

“接下来有什么打算？”这句话不知听了好几回。

人们总害怕在生命中失去奋斗的目标，

害怕失去活下去的意义，

害怕失去盘旋的重心，

害怕迷失自我；

因为大家都相信，“人因梦想而伟大”。

可是，

当梦想都实现后，

就会有另一个梦想的诞生，

然后，

人们又开始奋斗了，

然后，

梦想又实现了，

然后，

此轮徊又不断的被重复着。

然后，

怎样？？

回忆与时间

回忆是件沉重的事，

跟思念一样，

也是有重量的。

回忆是时间的函数，

但时间的方向永远朝后，

回忆的方向却一定往前。

两者都只有一个方向，

但方向却相反。

（摘自于蔡智恒之《蠏寄生》）