Finally...

I'v been wanting 2 write this for long n perhaps this is the most appropriate time.
We've gone tru perhaps the most emotional periods in our lives,
and I'v never imagined that I would ever get so 'emo'
It's a journey of self-discovery I shall say...

What I mean were those torturing (err I should not perceive it this way) moments of non-stop studying,
no-fun-at-all life, waking up everyday just 2 feel nauseated n lifeless but to be grateful that I was still alive...
Today was the moment that we harvested the results of our hardwork.
This was probably the moment that we have 2 cherish n perhaps, celebrating?

But ironically, I was not 'emotional' as I had imagined myself would be.
I found that there's no reason to be happy or sad.
Should I reward myself for completing one of the most important milestones in my life?
Should I be resentful that I've not done my best?
Should I shout out in facebook thanking everyone that I could think of as others did?
Should I break into tears that finally everything is over?

The fact is I did not do or feel any of the above.
In fact, im feeling blue and down as a whole,
well I know that I shouldn't.
I really learnt that life is not a bed of roses,
and life is NOT FAIR at all...

Why should we let our one-day performance to determine how good or how bad we are?
Why are people working so hard all these while have to face such cruel truths?
Why hard works not always paid off?
I tot they said the harder u work the luckier u get??
I really do feel this for friends who were not fortunate enough 2 go through this,
I've no idea how oneself would take this,
but I really do hope they are, and will be fine.

Back to myself, what do I expect?
I hope that I've be given a license to heal and not to kill.

Let's make these our mottos:
*To cure sometime, to heal most of the time and to comfort all the time*
*Be humorous at times but to be humble always*
and the most important,
*Not trying to be brilliant ones, be SAFE ones*

~MD UKM 2012~

《一起走到》yanzi

在我心中，

我知道，

这是永恒的长跑；

好不容易，

来到这里，

明天还要追更多荣耀。。

把自己角色扮演好，

全力以赴，

每一秒；

和我的家人，

和我的朋友，

向着目标，

手牵手，

要一起走到。。

God i need Your blessings...

2 more days... then that's it...

every1 else is going back for holidays but im stil here with my fellow posting-mates, yet 2 sit for the short case examination next wk...

God, i really need ur blessings,

may i not getting tough examiners,

may the patients cooperate,

may i not panicked,

may i finish everything in time,

and may everything goes smooth...

pls, pls, pls....

~amitabha~

*exhausted*

finally....

yeah, finally the day which i'v been waiting for has come.
after all those torturing and schorching study weeks and exam days, everything has come to an end (temporarily).

flashing back on those days in semester 3, i realise that time really flies.
it's like stepping out from yesterday and today, m here again facing a new era, with much more impending predicament awaiting.

now, what i can do is to cross my fingers, praying fervently that my results go well and all hard work shall be paid off. i always believe that, when you do your best, God shall do the rest for you. n if there's a will, there's always a way.

i wish to write more but it seems that my 'dream guy' is calling upon me.
the next time i log in, i shall be in penang enjoying my idle third semester holidays.

zzzzzz.....zzzzzz......

"home sweet home"

please do not get me wrong by just taking a glance at the title.
m not yet at home (in this contex, i mean my hometown) but i feel the warmth at home.
yea, my parents are coming over for 3 days staying with me.

we had our dinner at danau kota with my elder brother a couple of hours ago.
well, finally i could have a more 'proper' dinner which looked like one after so many days of torturing my stomach with all those processed food. sorry o, my dear GIT....

today i went to the dissection hall for revision of the anatomy for my finals' OSPE.
in fact i don't have more than 5-hour sleep from yesterday until now..
BUT..... too bad i can't afford to switch off the light and hide in my blanket for the moment, as there are much more stuff yet to be digested....

as usual, i shall not mumbling too much as there's no time to waste again...
it's time to wake up (although i had not even slept yet) and continue my date with mr.sheerwood and betterstill, mr.ganong.

unfinished battle....

well, the exam is not over yet (and it has not started yet)...

perhaps i should contemplate at my notes now but i have the sudden urge to log in here and....
yes i'm here again.

i should say that i've been leading very unhealthy lifestyle these few days : instant noodles, canned food, coffee, bread, biscuits, etc were those entering my stomach. it's quite an irony for a medical student to lead this kind of life... the reason is simple, walking through a stone's throw distance to buy food seems to bother me so much that i choose to stay at home.

one good news is that my parents are coming over tomorrow. yeah!!! i've been looking for this moment since the first day of my study weeks. frankly speaking, i hope that i'l have more time for study weeks as i quite enjoy the tranquility of staying alone (let me clarify, it doesn mean that i don't like staying with others) and of course, i still have so much to cover before i'm 'qualified' to battle in my finals..

i gues i have to (no, i must) stop now or else there's no way for me to finish my 'target' today.
jia you, jia you!!!
good luck is always with the man who does not expest it. yeah!!

study, study, study....

starring blankly at the desktop's displaying clock, only to realise that time really can 'fly'...
it's 1am in the morning, without me even realising it.

well, perhaps i shudn't admit that i'm weary, having studying almost for the whole day (not really, though, as u can see, m stil loitering ard the net) in the midst of these 2-week study break. to make this even more miserable, i shall add on the fact that i'm the only one in this house who have chosen to stay here and not going back to my hometown. i do not know whether i'v made a sound choice, but hopefully that the outcome is appealing.... that is, i really hope that God will give me strength and grant me with luck for this final examination of the 3rd semester in my life as a medical student.

well, i have much more to write but the 'energy store' in my body does not allow me to convert my thought into words. plus my notes are calling for my attention, only to arouse my guilt for wasting too much precious time these few days. I shall continue this next time i sign in, hopefully with a much more flattering 'post-exam' mood.

tomorrow will be better
i shall keep fighting, yeah!!!